Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
Randomize
