I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
I'm at about main and main street
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize
