yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
Randomize