Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize
