A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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