i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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