I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
