last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
you tried to scramble eggs in my dryer last night. i want you here in 15 minutes to clean this shit up
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
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