don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
mondays should just be called national damage control day
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
Randomize
