We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
I woke up to a topless girl handing me a blunt. Candidate for greatest wake-up ever?
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize
