I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
Randomize
