see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
I told the cop it was my birthday and he said "happy fuckin birthday", handcuffed me and threw me in the back of the cop car.
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize
