they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
Randomize
