He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
Randomize
