...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
Randomize
