thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
vagina is talking i cant
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
I currently don't understand fingers.
Randomize
