There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
Small penises have feelings too.
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Randomize
