anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
Randomize
