Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
Randomize
