Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
