If Curt Schilling could pitch a game with that blood-filled sock... if Tiger Woods won the 2008 US Open with a torn ligament, then I'd be an embarrassment to the human race if I couldn't manage to at least jerk him off even if I was still crying after he put it in my butt.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
Randomize