so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Randomize
