I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Randomize
