yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
She even gives head with a lisp.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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