he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
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