And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
Randomize