I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
Randomize
