it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
