your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize
