On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Randomize
