hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
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