walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
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