Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
i just told my mom tuesday boozeday rhymes so that she can remember not to text or call me on wednesday mornings
youre going to kill that woman one of these days
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
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