i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
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