I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
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