It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
