I called you to phone bone last night, but you were out with your boring friends playing video games
So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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