worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
Randomize
