I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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