He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
Randomize
