Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
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