I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Randomize
