But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
i'm 85% sure that if you don't visit me i will do something awkward and potentially dangerous to you in your sleep involving chocolate milk and a sham-wow.
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
