All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
Randomize
