I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
I stole a fireplace last night.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
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