I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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