If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
I was giving him a blow job in the kitchen, but it was uncomfortable. so i took the oven mitts and used them as knee pads.
Don't tell me i'm not fucking resourceful.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
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