Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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