My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
Ya’ll! My debit card got switched with my boss’ at lunch today (both Red Wells Fargo)....I realized it at whole foods AFTER I ran it for $100 at Vanity Room getting my vaj waxed 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Most awkward IOU ever tomorrow.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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