I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
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