I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize