If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
Randomize
